Rats. We had an event that went so late last night, I missed doing a column.

So, for those who missed David Letterman . . .

The “Top 10” rejected Gore-Lieberman campaign slogans, as presented by Vice President Gore on “The Late Show with David Letterman” last night:

10. Vote for me or I’ll come to your home and explain my 191-page economic plan to you in excruciating detail.

9. Remember America, I gave you the Internet and I can take it away. Think about it.

8. Your vote automatically enters you in a drawing for the $123 billion surplus.

7. With Lieberman on the ticket, you get all kinds of fun new days off. Vote for us, we’re going to work 24/6.

6. We know when the microphone is on.

5. Vote for me and I will take whatever steps are necessary to outlaw the term, “Whazzzup.”

4. Gore-Lieberman: You don’t have to worry about pork-barrel politics.

3. You’ll thank us in four years when the escalator to the moon is finished.

2. If I can handle Letterman, I can handle Saddam Hussein.

1. I’ll be twice as cool as that President guy in the “West Wing.”


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