You’re wondering just how long apples in a refrigerator can last?

You may not have been wondering that before, but now you are.

A week? Two weeks?

Three?

How about four and a half months, baby!*

In Columbus’s day, they had no refrigerators, only maggots, rickets, and terns. It’s a miracle he ever found this place. But he did, and the bond market and banks are closed today in commemoration thereof.

The stock market, by contrast, is open – if only to vault the Dow tenfold, from 1175, where I carelessly placed it Friday (throwing off the rest of my calculations by a zero as well), back to where the rest of the world thought it was.

☞ But sure enough, on the Sunday shows yesterday, the Republicans on to talk about Mark Foley found ways to talk about the record-high stock market. Except that, as noted Friday, the S&P 500 is down 11% after six years, the NASDAQ is down 54%, and both are down way more than that against the Euro or the Canadian dollar – let alone gold.

(They also emphasized the wonderfully low gasoline prices, about which you already know my suspicions.)

MUST SEE TV

Only 7,889 people have viewed this video on YouTube since it was added March 2. I’m almost sure you’ll be glad you were the 7,890th – and that you’ll want to share it widely. Meanwhile, HR 550 – a bill that has the support of virtually every Democrat in the House – would restore the integrity of our elections, and thus our democracy.

Whether you’re sleeping in today or racing to work, this video is worth your time.

 


*If there’s no column tomorrow, you’ll know why. But so far, I feel fine.

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