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Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

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Andrew Tobias
Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

The 2% 400-Pound Jockey

September 29, 1997February 3, 2017

“I rolled money over from a profit sharing plan in a company I left into an IRA. At the time I knew little about investing and signed up with a gentleman who said he would manage it for 2% a year, and said that it should return 10% a year, based on his model forecasts. He gets the 2% every year, but the performance of the funds has been lackluster, which worries me because the market was doing the best it had ever done. I am 27 and plan to keep it in an IRA until I am 65. Would I be better off rolling the money into a self managed index mutual fund like Vanguard, and just forgetting about it?”

Yes! Two percent is a terrible handicap — like betting on a horse with a 400-pound jockey.

“This is no friend-of-a-friend story, this one happened to me! I received a wedding present from a friend, (let’s call him Mr. Perkins). It was a glass platter shaped like a fish. Inside the box was a card reading: ‘To: Mr. and Mrs. Perkins, From: Mr. and Mrs. Matthews.’ Apparently, my wife and I liked the platter more than the Perkins family did. We hung it up as a wall decoration. I resisted the temptation to hang the card next to it.” –Scott Flanagan

Well, see? That was just my point! The Perkinses were right to regift it to you! You like trout-shaped platters! They just should have paid closer heed to Regifting Principle #2.

 

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