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Andrew Tobias
Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

Praise And A Suggestion For The President

November 15, 2025

PRAISE

Trump unveils deal to expand coverage and lower costs on obesity drugs.

This is great.  Dr. Oz Proclaims Americans Could Lose ‘135 Billion Pounds’ by Midterm Elections With New Weight Loss Drug Pricing — by which he meant 135 million not billion, but still.  The true goal should be somewhere in between, because surely we 340-or-so million Americans are on average more than 6 ounces — but less than 400 pounds — over our healthiest weight.

SUGGESTION

You could lose a pound or two yourself.  But that’s not my actual suggestion.  My suggestion is that — because surely the President of the United States cannot be a pedophile — you release the Epstein files.  If your suspicions about the Democrats whom you’ve ordered the Justice Department to investigate are true, you’ll kill two birds with one stone: exposing them while exonerating yourself.  (Another suggestion:  Rename the “Department of Justice” the “Department of War on People You Don’t Like”).

Also: Release the contents of Hunter Biden’s laptop.  Your supporters know they are of true national significance.  So why shield the Bidens?  And release what the investigators you sent to Hawaii found about Barack Obama’s birthplace.  You said, “They can’t believe what they’re finding!”  So let us see!

(And release your 2013, 2014, and 2015 tax returns?  Are they still under audit?)

HOAXES

The whole Epstein thing is a hoax.  The climate crisis is a hoax.  Your rape of E. Jean Carroll was clearly a hoax — because why would you have attacked her?  In your words, “she’s Not My Type.”  (Though she seems happy in this photo with Epstein, whom you allegedly regaled about the incident shortly after it happened.)  Your 2020 election defeat was rigged — a hoax.

The Russia thing, obviously, is a hoax . . . but Benghazi, Benghazi, Benghazi was real.

In point of fact, though — on that last point, Russia versus Benghazi — there is a difference.  Here it is:  No fewer than six Republican-led investigations cleared Hillary of any wrong-doing; whereas the Mueller report, which none of your supporters have read, found nearly 400 pages of evidence pointing to collusion that could not be proven in its strict legal definition because of your obstruction of justice, for which more than 1,000 former Republican and Democratic federal prosecutors said any other American would have been indicted.  So Benghazi — though tragic — was not a justifiable stain on Secretary Clinton’s service; while the only tragic thing about the Russia investigation is that you and Bill Barr managed to get no one to read it.

BONUS

A blast from Trump’s past — Trump’s generosity knew no bounds.  It is well worth affirming you are “not a robot” to read this account.  (Actually, he was promoting a start-up that, like his steaks and airline and university and foundation, seems now nowhere to be found.  But, boy, does he know how to put on a show.)


Our DNC LGBT dinner last night was great.  The carrot cake was amazing.  Governors Whitmer, Hochul, and Healey. DNC Chair Ken Martin.  Congresswoman Sarah McBride, HRC President Kelley Robinson — and Emily “Hawking” Shiller, a trans Navy fighter pilot who flew 50 combat missions before retiring after 20 years and who leads SPARTA, with more than 3,000 members (of the estimated 18,000 trans members of the military).

Thanks to all of you who contributed to help fund the opposition party!  And to all of you who still will!

Have a great weekend.

 

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