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Andrew Tobias

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Andrew Tobias
Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane – It’s Lunch!

June 13, 1997February 3, 2017

I had a couple of ostrich burgers just now (oh, Lord! he’s back on his ostrich jag — spare us!), and I have to tell you, especially for those who are relatively new to this site and who missed prior ostrich postings that even sizzled in my unskilled skillet they came out tasting almost exactly as burgers should taste. They tasted, that is, like ketchup. No better, no worse, and very little different.

I tell you this not as a money-saving tip. The stuff goes for $3.50 a ground pound plus shipping. And the shipping, if you get your birdburger flown in, as I do — 318-894-3044 — ain’t cheap. (Ah, the irony. The poor birds have to die to fly.) Rather, I tell you because for those of you who had your last burger years ago, when your buttons began popping and your cholesterol level began to resemble an area code, it should be interesting to note that there’s actually less fat in ostrich than in chicken or turkey (2 grams versus 3 grams in a small portion), let alone beef(16 grams). And yet this is as “red” a meat as you’re likely to find.

The other advantage of ostrich is that for quasi-semi-pseudo-neo vegetarians — i.e., those of us who still eat fish and chicken but have largely sworn off more lovable animals — ostrich are fowl and nasty. I know, I know: there’s no fat at all in a turnip. But for those who like red meat, ostrich may be a temporary compromise.

Full disclosure: I own no ostrich farms, no ostrich futures, am in no way related to anyone (I know of) who does. I did get a two free ostrich eggs from Superior Ostrich after plugging them the last time, but one of them came broken and I’m really not sure what to do with the other. Your health is my only motivation here.

 

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