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Andrew Tobias

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Andrew Tobias
Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

Friends Write . . .

August 1, 2000February 15, 2017

An impish friend urges: “Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.”

Another friend mailed me an extraordinarily generous $20,000 contribution to the Democratic National Committee, but the Post Office decided not to deliver it because she had used a square envelope. It wasn’t a big envelope, but there was no denying it was a square envelope – five and three quarters inches on a side – and I guess the Post Office figures we all know there is an 11-cent “non-standard surcharge.” So after it came back to her for more postage and she phoned to tell me this, I walked down to get it. (For 33 cents the Post Office would have carried a rectangular envelope 8,500 miles to a rural hut up the side of a volcano on Maui, but to take this square envelope 1,000 yards, it insisted on an extra 11 cents.) When I got home, I noticed that she had written in the memo, “to Gore’s success.” This, of course, invalidates the check. (Party committees cannot accept checks that appear to be earmarked in any way for a specific race. Although we at the DNC are aware there is a Presidential campaign underway, and that many of our contributors have an interest in it, you can just imagine how our democracy could be subverted if a check with such a memo were deposited.) I am awaiting a replacement, and have asked the donor to check the dimensions of her envelope with the Postal Service first.

A Jewish friend writes: “Did you know that Bush recently proclaimed June 10th ‘Jesus Day’ in the State of Texas? It’s right there on the Texas web site. I think Jesus was a hugely great man; but what about the separation of church and state? I thought Christmas and Easter were already pretty good Jesus days.”

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