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Andrew Tobias
Andrew Tobias

Money and Other Subjects

Cooking Like a Guy™

September 28, 2000February 15, 2017

RECIPE #6 – Stale Bread

Every cloud has a silver lining. You know how reheating pizza in a microwave turns its crispy crust soft? It’s something no guy can be happy about — but by the exact same principle of wave theory, a microwave will also take a stale slice of bread or English muffin or hot dog roll and render it warm, soft and moist.

Step #1: Insert stale bread. (Remove mold, as needed. Or not.)

Step #2: Nuke 10 or 12 seconds.

Step #3: Proceed with whatever you had in mind.

Gourmet Variant:

Find a hunk of old cheese way at the back of the refrigerator? Stick it on top of the bread before nuking, and nuke until it melts into a soft, creamy bread spread. Remove. Allow to cool. Eat. Brilliant with brie, cheddar, explorateur, parmesan, or any other rock of old cheese.

Tomorrow: A Novel Way to De-Seed Watermelon

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